The Peculiar Prodigy of Epsilon Brown
by hmmga
Summary: It's been 14 years since the war, and Epsilon is back working for MIB. But when a one night stand turns into a ten year old child, can he cope with being thrust into parenthood? With his son about to embark on his own time at Hogwarts, Epsilon's own past is about to come barrelling back. Can he reconcile with those he left behind, all those years ago?
1. Chapter 1

**Okay, so I said I wasn't going to do a sequel, but I was stuck for ideas for July's Camp Nanowrimo, and this kind of crept up and bit me on the ass.**

**The prequel to this is The Secret Life of Epsilon Brown, and you can find the link on my profile page. But if you don't want to read it… basically Harry Potter was brought up as Epsilon Brown by Men in Black. It is SERIOUSLY AU.**

**The Peculiar Prodigy of Epsilon Brown**

**It's been 14 years since the war, and Epsilon is back working for MIB. But when a one night stand turns into a ten year old child, can he cope with being thrust into parenthood? With his son about to embark on his own time at Hogwarts, Epsilon's own past is about to come barrelling back. Can he reconcile with those he left behind, all those years ago?**

**Prologue - August 12th 1998 (19 Years Old)**

Epsilon was quite certain that he was drunk.

He was also vaguely aware that he was most likely in a Wizarding establishment. In London.

This was probably a Very Bad Idea.

He downed another fire whiskey anyway, this wasn't the time to develop a sense of responsibility. He had too much of that in everyday life. He was done with responsibility. He brandished his glass to emphasise his silent declaration, and laughed slightly as his vision blurred.

He was _so_ drunk. His father was going to kill him in the morning.

"Nice suit, stranger."

He turned to see a girl, more or less his age, leaning against the bar alongside him.

"Hey there," he said with a lopsided smile. "How you doin'?"

She smiled back at him, before turning to the bartender.

"One fire whiskey, please."

"Make that a double," said Epsilon. "Her drink on me."

"You don't have to-"

"It's my pleasure," he told her, fumbling in his pockets for the last of his change. "You, my Lady, are clearly not drunk enough."

She laughed lightly and took the drink.

"Whereas you have had a bit too much already."

"Hey, gimme a break," he whined. "I'm not legal yet back in the States. Lemme enjoy my freedom."

"Ooh, you're American," she said, her blue eyes sparkling up at him. "Where are you from?"

"New York. You seem somewhat familiar, have I been drinking with you before?"

"I highly doubt that. Did you go to Hogwarts?"

"That I did. Epsilon Brown, Hufflepuff alumni at your service."

"Julianna Cook, Ravenclaw."

"Charmed. I think I remember you now, you were the year behind me. Another drink?"

"I'd love one."

A few more drinks later and Julianna had joined Epsilon in a contented haze, as she blearily filled him in on her work into experimental Arithmancy. Epsilon had to admit that it was slightly over his head. He had only covered basic arithmancy at school, and mathematics had never been one of his favourite subjects despite MIB giving him a _very_ thorough grounding. Eventually though the girl's enthusiasm petered out, and it was her turn to ask a question.

"So what are you doing in London? They say you vanished after the war."

Curious. Evidently she was one of many who hadn't made the connection between the mysterious Epsilon Brown and the believed-dead Harry Potter. It was quite a relief.

"Workin' a job," he told her, his words starting to slur slightly. "A bunch of Krellites flew in from the Adina system, an' tried to settle in London without proper affi- other- authentication."

"I see."

Epsilon suddenly noticed that a lock of Julianna's brown hair had fallen in her face, and was now covering one of her eyes. This was unacceptable.

Her breath caught as he brushed it back behind her ear, and she pulled him down by his shoulders to kiss him.

_This is a really bad idea,_ his instincts were screaming. _Really irresponsible…_

But he was too drunk to listen to his instincts. He had no inclination to be responsible tonight.

Besides, Julianna was _really_ pretty.

XXX

The first thing Epsilon was truly aware of was the high pitched beeping that was burrowing into his brain and causing indescribable amounts of pain. He groaned and rolled over, almost immediately colliding with something warm.

"What…"

His eyes widened as he saw Julianna lying next to him, still fast asleep, and he looked around wildly as vague memories from the night before filtered into his consciousness. He was in Julianna's apartment, in the tiny bedroom that obviously doubled as a study. He gaped at the stacks of paper that littered the desks, and the equations that papered the walls. This girl was a _genius_.

The beeping started up again. With another groan he plucked his trousers off the floor, fumbling in the pockets for his communicator.

"Yeah?" he asked quietly, his voice hoarse. "What is it?"

"_Epsilon Brown, where the hell are you?" _came his father's voice. "_We were scheduled to leave ten minutes ago. Did you even come back to the hotel last night?"_

Epsilon swore as he checked his clock to find that his father was right.

"Sorry, dad. I'm… actually, I'm not _entirelysure_ where I am."

There was a moment's silence.

"_Kid, what the hell have you done?"_

"I'll get back to you when I figure that out," he told him. "Look, I'll be there… soon. I'm sorry about this."

"_Just get your ass back here now!"_

Epsilon sighed as the connection was broken.

"Are you in trouble?"

Julianna was opening her eyes.

"I'm sorry," said Epsilon. "I didn't mean to wake you."

"S'okay," she murmured. "I guess you need to go now."

"Uh, yeah. Look, about last night, I'm sorry, I don't normally… do that."

"Me neither," she said sleepily. "Don't worry about it, Epsilon. My friends took me out last night to 'loosen up'. I guess they were right."

"Where am I? I need to get back to the rendezvous point at St Pancreas Station…"

"This is Chiswick," she told him. "But you can use my floo, if you like."

"Thank you," he said, awkwardly gathering up his clothes. "Good luck with your research."

"It was nice to meet you," she said. "Uh… can you show yourself out?"

"Sure thing," he said. "Goodbye."

"Yeah, see you around, I guess."


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 1**

"What do you mean, _you don't know_? Are you telling me that they got away?"

The British Junior Agent on the screen mumbled, fiddling with the collar of his new suit.

"Well," he said nervously. "We infiltrated the news corporations to make them believe it was a gas leak, and none of the survivors actually _saw_ the Dakotan, so we figured…"

"Did you wipe security tapes? Wipe the memories of _everyone_ involved, whether or not they saw the extra-terrestrials? Scour the scene for any clues as to where they may have moved on to?"

"Um…"

"I thought not," Epsilon sighed. "Okay, you better start cleaning up your mess. How many dead?"

"Just ten, sir."

"Civilians?"

"Yes, sir. All residents of the flats. Four adults, three females and a male. Six children, all under three. Not many people around on a Monday morning."

"Ten people is still too many. You'll need to list the names and record the coordinates for the report. New York Base out."

Epsilon switched off the screen and turned to his father, who had been watching silently from the background.

"I see you're still enjoying being able to pull rank."

"It has it's advantages," said Epsilon. "The British team are so… young."

"Look who's talking."

"I mean it, dad. This was the first proper action they've seen, and they lost it. Lost the aliens, lost the residents, lost the whole damn plot."

"Give them time."

"Since when have _you_ been Mr Lenient?"

"This is a brand new sector, there's bound to be a few teething problems. You should have been here when this gig started, now _that_ was a mess."

Epsilon rolled his eyes, forwarding the incoming report to one of the archive team. He didn't bother to read it.

"Of all the places on the earth," he mused. "Why the hell would they attack _Chiswick_?"

XXX

"What the hell am I doing with my life?"

Epsilon looked up from his coffee to see J slump into the chair next to him, rubbing his temples.

"Bad day?" he asked.

"Worse," groaned J. "A family of Impala just landed planet side, and the kids… they just wouldn't stop _running._"

"Jesus Christ," muttered Epsilon. "Have I got to do damage control?"

"Nah, it's okay, Omega's handling it. I hate kids."

"They're not so bad."

"Each to their own, I guess. What are you doing tonight?"

"That depends."

"Are you still grounded?"

"I'm thirty years old. I haven't been _grounded_ since I was nineteen. I'm an adult, I don't do 'grounded'."

"I don't think your father's gotten that particular memo."

"Tell me something I don't know."

"What don't I know?"

K had appeared behind J, making him jump and slop coffee everywhere.

"Damn!" he yelped. "We need to put a bell on your collar or something."

"I'll put that on the agenda for the next staff meeting," joked Epsilon. "Send a memo to the wardrobe department."

"Epsilon Brown you might want to shut your mouth before you swallow your feet. Now I want answers, and I want them now.

"Answers?" asked Epsilon. "I… what kind of answers? What was the question?"

"Don't act all innocent, as if you don't know!"

"Don't know what?"

"For God's sake, kid, why is there a wizard in Zed's office?"

"What!" Epsilon was up out of his chair like a jack-in-the-box, his face draining of colour. "There's a wizard here? Why? When did he arrive?"

"I was hoping you would tell me," grunted K. "He's blonde, wears a suit, and arrived about ten minutes ago requesting to see you. What have you done now?"

"Nothing, I swear!"

"Really."

"I'm serious, dad! I haven't been in contact with any of _them_ for over ten years!"

"Well, obviously not because this guy's British."

Epsilon swore.

XXX

"Draco?"

The blonde wizard in the suit turned at the sound of his name, and nodded to his old friend.

"Hello, Epsilon."

Epsilon shot Zed a pleading look and he got the hint, slipping quickly out of the office to leave them alone. The two wizards regarded each other in silence for a moment.

"How are you?"

"I'm good, I guess," said Epsilon. "You?"

"I am well. It's been a long time."

"How did you find me?"

"Tracking spells, of course."

"The illegal ones?"

"We had to bend a few laws," admitted Draco stiffly. "But this is an emergency."

This got Epsilon's attention.

"What kind of emergency?"

"Well, probably not _your_ kind of emergency, but a… I think you'd call it a 'situation'."

"Go ahead."

At this point Draco reached into his jacket pocket, suddenly the fully professional Ministry of Magic employee.

"Were you familiar with a Julianna Jane Cook?"

"Julianna? Dark hair, blue eyes? Yes, I knew her. Haven't seen her for at least ten years."

"I am sorry to inform you that she died just a few days ago."

Epsilon was silent, shock and confusion coursing through his mind. He wasn't quite sure what to say.

"I knew her for all of twelve hours," he admitted. "Why are you telling _me _this?"

Draco's eyebrows seemed to be crawling up his forehead.

"Because she had no adult family, few friends, and because you are the main benefactor of her will."

"_What?_"

"Twelve hours, you said?" continued Draco sadly. "I wasn't sure what to expect, but I didn't think it was like _that_?"

"What are you talking about?"

"Are you aware she had a son?"

"I… no, I wasn't."

Epsilon's mind was going in circles, his thoughts looping back around as they kept coming back to the inevitable conclusion.

"Please don't tell me he's ten years old," he groaned.

"You always were good at sums," shrugged Draco. "The parentage test we carried out came back positive."

Epsilon didn't even ask. He didn't want to know how they managed magical paternity tests.

"So… what happens now? I've never even met the kid. _Hell, _I didn't even know he existed! I… um… what's his name?"

"Sebastian," said Draco, rubbing the bridge of his nose. "Look, Epsilon, I know this is a lot to take in, but we need to get this sorted _now_. One of the ass holes lower in the department leaked this to Rita Skeeter, this will be all over the _Prophet_ tomorrow. We need to get this boy out the country _tonight_ or it's going to be a complete media circus with poor Sebastian at the centre."

"What, so you're just going to let me take him? Gonna hand him off to a total stranger just like that?"

"It goes against all our protocols, but yes," sighed Draco. "We have no choice. Normally we would arrange temporary foster care and home visits. Gentle integration, but now we're being forced to dig back through the book. The old adoption laws are still in effect, and state that if a blood link is proven, the father has the right to automatically take the child and protect them as he sees fit."

"You already have the proof."

"Yes. The paperwork needed to change his surname is being filled in as we speak."

"He's _not_ going to be a Potter!"

"No, of course not. We're not _that _stupid. Potter isn't your legal name anyway, your muggle adoption still stands, despite what _Dumbledore _tried to do…"

"What did Dumbledore try to do?"

Draco stopped and sighed again.

"I think we should continue this in my office," he said eventually. And pressing an old quill into his hands they were gone.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 2**  
The once-familiar feel travel by portkey jarred against his memory, and for a moment he felt like he was a teenager once again. He half expected to have appeared on platform nine and three-quarters, ready to return to Hogwarts.  
Instead he was in a tiny office, overflowing with papers and folders. It was the direct opposite to the kind of workplace Epsilon had expected for his friend.  
"Take a seat," Draco told him, shifting the papers enough to uncover a chair. "Look out for the cat."  
"Cat…"  
As if on cue there was a soft meow, and a fluffy ball of fur stalked over to leap onto Draco's lap.  
"You have a cat," said Epsilon flatly.  
"What did you expect? A dog?"  
Epsilon continued to stare around the room.  
"Sit down," insisted Draco again, tapping a teapot with his wand. "We have a lot to discuss. Excuse the mess."  
"No, it's alright, I'm just surprised. I expected your office to be more… meticulous."  
"It would have been," said Draco, pouring out two mugs of tea. "If I'd taken the job my _daddy_ had set up for me by the time I was six. If it wasn't for you and Justin, I'd probably be Minister of Magic by now,"  
"Damn, I'm sorry."  
"I wasn't looking for an apology," Draco grinned, holding up a mug like a salute. "Thanks. So, what have you been up to?"  
The question took Epsilon by surprise.  
"What? I thought we needed to talk about… the boy."  
"Sebastian is sleeping. My secretary will let me know when he wakes up. So, what happened to you when you took off? How has the last decade been treating you?"  
Epsilon squirmed under Draco's stern gaze.  
"At least you've grown," continued the blonde man. "You were always the smallest out of all of us."  
"I know," said Epsilon quietly, spotting a ring on his friend's finger. "So… you're married?"  
"Yep, got a little boy."  
"Really? What did you call him?"  
"Scorpius."  
Epsilon choked on his tea.  
"You're kidding, right?"  
"Of course I am! He's called Lysander."  
"Because that's a much more sensible name," snorted Epsilon. "Please tell me your wife chose it."  
"Yes," smirked Draco. "Hermione has a taste for Shakespearean names."  
"You married Hermione," said Epsilon with a small smile. "That's nice."  
"Yeah."  
"I thought that her and Justin were a… thing."  
"Yes, they were," said Draco. "But life happens, people change... He's married to Jimmy now, remember him? The sweet kid in the year below?  
"Wow. Good for him."  
"Yeah. They're out in Singapore at the moment, 'finding themselves' or something equally wacky."  
"Justin?"  
"He was never the same after the battle."  
"Yes, well, none of us came out fine and dandy, did we?"  
"He's happy now, I guess that's all that matters. You just disappeared."  
"Um… sorry?"  
"Did you go straight back to America?"  
"No. I wandered around a bit first. Just drifted really. I was being hunted."  
"Yes, I was one of those looking for you. Led us a merry dance."  
"I didn't want to be found!"  
"That became evident."  
"Dumbledore just wanted to drag me back to become his poster boy!"  
"Yeah, I know, we stopped looking after the first few weeks. You know how to stay hidden."  
An awkward silence fell between the two, and Draco began shuffling his files again.  
"Papers… papers… ah, there they are!"  
He extracted a few sheets of parchment with a flourish, handing them over.  
"If you'd just sign on the dotted line, I think I have a quill here somewhere…"  
"No worries," said Epsilon, pulling a biro out his pocket. "I never worked out how to use a quill."  
He examined the forms carefully.  
"Sebastian _Icarus_ Brown?"  
Draco shrugged again. "That's his name. Or it will be when you've signed those forms. Please be aware that this contract is magically binding and cannot be rescinded… etc etc…"  
"Got it."  
"Excellent! Just date it and then…"  
"The door opened, and a young man stuck his head in the door."  
"Code white," he said. "The boy's awake and ready to leave."  
"Thank you, Frank."  
The man disappeared back out.  
"My secretary," explained Draco. "Dumbledore's got wind that something going on. Let's get moving."  
Epsilon was led out the office into a little sitting room area. His attention was immediately drawn to the boy sat on the threadbare sofa. He was small and skinny, with brown hair that fell over his eyes. His arms and face were coated in freckles.  
He looks just like her, was Epsilon's first thought, but then the boy, his son, looked up at him, and he saw Sebastian's eyes for the first time.  
"Well," said Sebastian. "There's no mistaking that shade of green."

XXX

"What's going on?"  
"Hi dad," said Epsilon, not even glancing at his father. "How's it going?"  
K didn't answer, following his son's gaze through a glass window. In the room beyond a boy was scribbling on one of the glass boards. Equations, he noticed, though what they were for he really couldn't tell.  
He turned back to Epsilon, frowning.  
"You're white as a sheet."  
"Thanks."  
"I mean it. What's going on?"  
Epsilon nodded his head towards the boy.  
"Meet Sebastian,"  
"Okay, that's Sebastian."  
"He's your grandson."  
It was a testament to the various surprises that had been sprung on K in his lifetime that the news barely made him blink.  
"My grandson?"  
"That's right."  
"I see."  
There was a moments silence.  
"His name's Sebastian?"  
"Yep."  
"_Sebastian_?"  
"That's what I said. You seem more shocked by the name than the biological relation."  
"Well... how old is he?"  
"Ten. Doesn't talk like it, though. Kid's a genius. I mean, look what he's doing now!"  
"I'll be damned."  
"He takes after his mother. She did arithmancy professionally."  
"You're not exactly short of brain cells yourself."  
"He's got my eyes."  
"You seem awfully calm about all this."  
"Trust me, dad, I'm completely freaked out. It just... I guess it still needs to sink in."  
"Good luck with that. This should make things more interesting."


End file.
